High-Conflict Divorce Attorneys in San Diego
Tips to Protect Yourself During a Contested Divorce
Being in a high-conflict divorce makes the divorce process more chaotic. You might not know what to do and you might feel like giving up, but don't. Take these tips from our San Diego divorce lawyers at Moore, Schulman & Moore, APC, on protecting yourself from your high conflict divorce.
Tune Out Negativity
It may be hard to tune out your spouse's negative and derogative statements, but just don't listen to them. If you let his or her words get to you, you are only giving them what they want. They are only trying to make you feel bad, so they best way to deal with it is to ignore it. Don't even bother trying to argue or reason with them. They probably won't listen and will most likely twist and turn the conversation around so they are never to blame. It will be hard at first not to show emotion and resist fighting back, but this is the best coping mechanism to deal with someone with a high conflict personality.
Limit the Contact
To help with tuning out your spouse, limit contact with him/her as much as possible. If you have children, you might not be able to cut your spouse out of your life completely, but just restrain communication unless it is about the children. A simple "hello" and "goodbye" is plenty. Don't give them any reason to start an argument or attack you.
It may be hard trying not to fight back or cry or plead, but just remember that is exactly what they want from you when they are creating drama. Don't give them the satisfaction of winning. You will win the battle by showing how much you don't care and how mature you are being. Even when you are providing your lawyer with information, you should hold back your emotions and present the information professionally. Don't let your spouse get to you.
Hire a Good Lawyer
Find a divorce lawyer that understands high conflict divorces and will best represent your legal rights. Although this can be financially devastating, it is important to have someone on your team who knows about the divorce process and can help guide you through it, especially when you have to deal with a high conflict spouse.
If You Must, Get a Restraining Order
If your spouse starts to get too aggressive or you feel in danger, you can always file a restraining order. Anyone can file for a restraining order without a say by the other spouse. It will start off as temporary restraining order until a hearing, where both parties can state their case and judge decides how much longer the restraining order should be in play.
Start Your New Life
A final tip; just start your new life. That can be hard when you have an ex that is constantly trying to remind you of the past. But they are only trying to stop you from moving on. Be the bigger person and put the negativity behind you. You deserve peace and happiness. Don't let anyone stop you from having that.
Tell our San Diego divorce attorneys about your case during an initial consultation: (858) 492-7968.