Divorce is a time to keep a financial mindset and to not allow emotions intervene in the legal process. However, it is also a time to stay mentally, emotionally and physically healthy. Here are tips to keep your emotions in a good place while finding your way through a divorce.
Don't shut out your friends and family
Don't allow yourself to become isolated. Divorce is a time where you feel an endless line of emotions and they are too heavy to keep to yourself. Friends and family are a priceless support system to help you sort out your life and new beginnings.
Stay on track with a healthy diet and exercise plan. Working out releases endorphins, which will stimulate happiness and energy. Fitness is also a great way to release anger and frustration. Having built up anger is unhealthy and you will carry it throughout your day. The stress will lighten during the divorce process if you feel better physically and about yourself.
Create structure in your day
It's important to keep busy during this time. The more active you are throughout the day, the less you will think about the stress, sadness and anger. You will also feel productive and your days will feel rewarding. If you cannot find enough activity to fill your day, try some of these out:
- Join a club to find a new sense of community
- Volunteer to help others. You will feel rewarded and could realize your struggles are not as challenging in comparison to the ones others are facing
- Let your inner artist out through painting, music, writing, gardening or any other right-brain creative activity
Let it out
It's okay to cry, to yell and to express what you're feeling inside. You just want to be smart in the manner in which you release these emotions. It could be as simple as sitting in your car in privacy and screaming until you feel everything is off your chest.
Another great release method is writing a fake letter to your ex. The only reason this is “fake” is because you do not actually send it to the person. However, every emotion, thought and feeling contained in the letter should be 100 percent real. Don't hold back and let it all out on the paper. You could do this as often as you'd like in order to sort through your thoughts and leave the past behind you. Keep the letters and read over them time after time. You will be amazed at your progress.
Find the right therapist
If your emotional battle is becoming too large of a burden, there is no shame in talking to a therapist. It's important to search for the right therapist for you and to interview them in the same way you interviewed your lawyer and financial advisor. You might also want to see if that person could testify in court if necessary.
Once the inner battle becomes overwhelming, even one consultation with a therapist or psychiatrist could do wonders for your emotional and mental state. Working with a professional who is distant from the divorce will help you sort out your thoughts and discover the best way to take on the future.
Focus on the road ahead
Above all, keep in mind these feelings are normal. Divorce is one of the hardest processes people face. Focus on the future and the happiness you will reach in your new life.